Letting Go and Living Lighter: 3 Decluttering Tips for Your 40s and Beyond
- Hillary Huyghue-Matias
- Jan 13
- 5 min read
Updated: Apr 15
Recently, while searching through my closet, I stumbled upon my favorite classic ‘little black dress.’ Seeing it triggered a rapid series of memories, prompting me to reflect on all the places it had been, all the things it had seen. If I close my eyes, I can vividly recall the moment I bought it and tried it on in the dressing room. As I slowly turned around to look at myself in the full-length mirror, I said, 'This is it! You're coming home with me!'
Did I forget to mention that my favorite little black dress is over 20 years old? While it’s great to have basic timeless pieces that don’t go out of style and are built with titanium-like non-combustible materials, after I returned from my trip down memory lane, I realized that the last time I wore the dress was over 4 years ago. Yet there it was, hanging in my closet like a priceless gold-plated trophy, a constant reminder of the vibrant younger me filled with adventure and endless energy.
As I sat there gazing at my version of Audrey Hepburn’s iconic ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s’ black dress, I decided that it was time to move on and get rid of the dress. Suddenly, I started to second-guess myself, and a barrage of mixed emotions came over me. I started convincing myself to keep it, thinking, 'Why not hold onto it? Surely, I'll have the chance to wear it again someday. After all, it's only 9 days into the New Year, and Keto seems to be working, plus I’ve already hit the gym twice this year!’ Why is it so hard to let go of items we have from the past? It can feel like you’re mourning a chapter in the book of your life that you can’t rewrite, only read about and lose yourself in the memories.
But here’s the real insight: decluttering in your 40s is about more than just making room; it’s about releasing the emotional weight that comes with all the stuff you’ve accumulated. If you're ready to lighten your load and simplify your life, here are three tips to help you reclaim your space—and your peace of mind.
The One-Year Decluttering Rule: Use It or Lose It!
The one-year rule is a powerful tool in the decluttering toolkit. If you haven’t used, worn, or even looked at something in the past year, it’s probably time to let it go. Spoiler alert: this is often easier said than done, as it means you have to be honest with yourself. For instance, if you're holding onto your favorite jeans because, for the 10th year in a row, you're convinced that this will be the year you can zip them up again without having the button torpedo into the air and take someone's eye out, remember that life and your body change. Are your cabinets filled with colorful dishes collected over the past two decades? If so, consider whether you really need twelve serving platters, especially since your last dinner party was a virtual one during the pandemic.
Does just the mere thought of trying to declutter make you want to throw in the towel?
Try This: Start Small and Set a Timer
Don’t overwhelm yourself by tackling the entire house in one go. Begin with one drawer or shelf and set a timer for 20 minutes. Treat it like a game: how much clutter can you eliminate before the timer goes off? Bonus points if you find something truly baffling, like a mysterious cassette labeled 'MIX TAPE.'
Embrace Minimalism and Reduce Stress
Let's face it, the more stuff you own, the more time you need to spend maintaining it. Also, keep in mind that if you don't use something, you'll likely lose it eventually, as items aren't designed to last forever. Remember those beautiful black butter-like leather Prada boots that you bought five years ago because they were on sale and you just had to have them? They were so beautiful that you decided to store them in their original box at the back of your closet for safekeeping. Fast forward to today, and when you dust off that box in the corner of your closet and open it, those gorgeous boots have now deteriorated into a cracked, peeling reminder that fashion fades, but the regret of spending $300 on something you never wore lasts forever.
Or, what about that vintage lava lamp from years ago that you're still holding onto? Have you thought about asking yourself, “Does this piece improve my life today?” Does it really add something to your space, or is it just a blast from the past? By focusing on practicality and functionality, you can make better decisions about the items you decide to keep in your home.
What if you have items you need to dispose of but aren't ready to let go of just yet?
Try This: Create a ‘Maybe’ Box
For items you’re on the fence about, put them in a box labeled “Maybe” and stash it somewhere out of sight. If you don’t miss anything in there after a few months, that might be your sign that it's time to let them go. Trust me, having three backup hand mixers in your cupboard in case the first two spontaneously combust is unlikely to happen.
3. You Can Be Both Sentimental and Practical
We all know the struggle of holding onto items because of the memories they carry. Maybe you're still holding on to your worn-out stuffed bear given to you at birth that's now missing a limb. Or maybe you have a collection of greeting cards so thick you're thinking of renting out a storage unit just to keep them? While letting go of keepsakes can be tough, if they take up so much space that you are now forced to sleep in a closet because your bedroom is the only space large enough in your house to store your knickknacks, it might be time to reevaluate your priorities. The hard truth is that sometimes, these items become more of a burden than a blessing.
Not ready to rid yourself of all your emotional keepsakes?
Try This: Create a Digital Time Capsule
Instead of keeping every sentimental piece, consider taking photos of items that represent your memories. By capturing the essence without keeping the physical item, you can free up valuable space and still cherish those moments. Research shows that people who practice this method often report feeling 50% less emotional attachment after decluttering while still being able to revisit memories through images.
Free Your Closet, Free Your Mind
Decluttering in your 40s is not just about getting rid of items; it’s about recognizing how you’ve grown and what you genuinely need in your life now. It’s a chance to create a welcoming environment for the future, leaving behind what no longer serves your vibrant life today. The truth is, holding onto clutter feels like clinging to the past—sentimental, yes, but it can also be suffocating.
So, while you're rummaging through your closet, cleaning out your drawers, and reminiscing over your memorabilia, take a moment to appreciate your journey. It might be a bit emotional to part with certain things, but remember: a less cluttered space equals a clearer mind. And who knows, while decluttering and going through old keepsakes, you might discover something worth selling on eBay, which is a definite win-win. So, embrace the lighter you, welcoming new possibilities without the weight of yesterday’s choices.
Here’s to your journey toward a simpler, more fulfilling life!
What about you? Are you ready to declutter your life?
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The suggestion to digitally photograph items is amazing. In the late 90s early 00s, the only way my child would disassembly Legos was if I photographed it for posterity. It never dawned on me to use it on myself. A new project for my bucket list, along with digitizing my 80s radio mix cassette tapes.